She turned back just to see him once again....

He smiled...

******

From childhood she wished to have a true love, actually her knowledge was too short to analyse about true love or she didn’t wish to analyse something so pure.

But time being so cruel made the pure love so polluted and she was unaware about what love is and what is not.

At times she find the traps under the smiling faces and when time comes or at a moment she failed to realise the cruel face behind those smiling one and mistook as love. But it didn’t take much time for realisation and it made her hurt a lot but she smiled because there were lots of friendly shoulders to make her comfort.

And she once again went in search of love and this time an understanding companion became her companion.”A boy and girl can’t be just true friends”

Don’t know which stupid tell those words but at cases this is true and their friendship roused to a higher level and they named it as love.

She was still unaware was that love???

But when he said good bye at a nearby day having lots of reasons to explain he never enquired what she had to tell

And that was a tragedy...

Not for loosing something called love but for losing a friend who was everything for her...

And from that day the name of love make her afraid... not for being cheated but for losing some other valuable relation.

And when she met him there was nothing in the mind. But his involvement makes her attracted towards him.

But this time she was not ready for an another experiment

Every time moving away from him was so difficult but she managed to do so. But he was not ready to leave.

And now she doesn’t want to get hurt once more so she is moving away with no commitments.

“He smiled”

What was in that smile, she don’t know but that smile is hurting her

Was this the love she was searching for....?

She don’t have enough strength to face one more failure

She turned back just to see him once again....

He smiled...

REACHING FOR THE STAR!!!!!

She walked fast.....
Her only focus was towards the spot of light that was breaking the deadly darkness all around.
Speed gradually increased.... only wish was to capture that light and to get rid of the darkness....
Looking towards the focus she ran...
Then she began to understand that her ray of hope is moving away from her...
Long time to make mind understand what is happening around
*************
Last night when she went to her bed, her only dream was to catch a star far above in the sky.
Slowly darkness spread around without her permission not even giving enough time to identify between dream and reality.
Darkness all around is not always a good atmosphere to experience about......
She waited.......
Time ran fast......
Still darkness around and a bloody silence......
“Crap” she yelled stretched her hand so wide to experience her surroundings.
“Vacant”
She slowly moved her legs apart and continues her search
Failed.....
She continued that for about thousand times and failed....
DARKNESS AND SILENCE
She was like in an empty cargo sealed tightly.
She continued her effort to get hold on something....
Then it happened,
A small ray of hope at far end breaks the darkness....
*************


She walked fast.....
Her only focus was towards the spot of light that was breaking the deadly darkness all around.
Speed gradually increased.... only wish was to capture that light and to get rid of the darkness....
Looking towards the focus she ran...
Then she began to understand that her ray of hope is moving away from her...
Long time to make mind understand what is happening around
*************
She stretched her arm so wide to capture her star and fell from the bed with a great sound
Ahh!!!!!!!
Is it so silly to dream to get a star!!!!!

A TRAIN FRIEND......

Staying in a hostel gave me opportunity to travel randomly to home. Every journey was special to me and most importantly my heart shake at my last journey.
When I reached railway station my mind was like the time before a heavy rain. Full of tension. It’s almost like that at every time the long queue in the front of the counter always makes me tensed that will I am going to miss the train. I spent time in the queue looking at the watch and listening eagerly to the announcement. Finally when I put my small hand inside the counter to fetch ticket my heart beat became normal. With heavy bags in my shoulder I walked fast to the bridge but unaware about which platform is waiting for me. Finally I walked to the fourth platform with a doubtful face.
I smiled at her and she smiled back and the cloud of strangeness gave way to friendship. Journey is always damp bore without a friend. I used to sit dump watching different faces around and never got a smile back and returned sadly and so I was too happy to see her.
Talking with her was not so difficult to me she remembered me of a face which I forget in the race of life. We shared a bond of friendship so close. Someone who haves all the naughtiness similar to me and she was never ashamed to share that. Something, which we can’t even express to a friend whom we know from years.
Time was running so fast and at the first time I never wished for that. When the train approach my station she was too sad to leave me in her remaining journey. With a pain of leaving I said bye and walked to the door with a hope of seeing her again in some other journey,
As her name demands she reminds me of a dream which I always wish to see..
I am glad to meet my dear train friend Sapna........

FRIENDSHIP

It’s a true saying that friendship is forever. I personally evaluate the relation of friendship. More than anything in this world and so I kept them so close to the heart that it will pain if it forgets to beat.
The value of friendship is something I cannot give price in my life and was unaware about the strength of friendship till it happens in my life.....As a naughty talkative earned lot of good relations in life whose importance cannot be understood by any other individual.
Yes I am going back to the same old story of an unseen friend who still lives in heart and in tears. He came to my life without asking any permission as an enemy and leaves me with a footprint that never fades by time.
He left with lots of unspoken stories with millions of uncracked jokes which he always wished to crack with others. Just to see a glimpse of smile.
Someone who make me laugh till the night and went even without saying a bye to the unknown world leaving just tears in our eyes.
Seasons keep on changing surrounding changed and time is running so fast but a story of unknown hero is remembered every night looking at the sky.
Traveling through the contacts of my phone I saw his name and my eyes get wet. Yes, I still keep his number in my phone just to make my stupid mind believe that he is always there at the other end busy with his naughtiness ready to fight with me.
Beliefs can get stronger and imagination overrules the life and smile emerges on the face remembering the fight between us.
It’s going to be one year after you left this cruel world, yes it’s true that the world is cruel but with friends even hell is a heaven...

Missing you a lot RINU.....

JOURNEY

Journey is a day to day action. Every journey will have a reason to be fulfilled ...I am travelling alone in search of myself.....

A first day journey to an unknown destiny was really full of tension and my stupid face reflects my tension inside but I was unaware about that and believed myself that I am well confident till a fellow passenger lend her kind hand to help lone girl in the new village....That day was an unforgettable day in my life and a smile emerge in my face when I saw her in an another journey.
This is life...
God will appoint someone at time of help whenever he feels the need of a helper...
Not the story of one day. I have lots of experience to share.
At the face of those people I am seeing the face of god... Pure and calm. Sometimes naughty and friendly....

I love the feeling of walking alone the unperfected road of panampillynagar .jumping in rhythm escaping from holes in the road and approaching another, in a cold weather with a cold breeze in and around. That breeze came to talk something romantic as I paid no attention it went near another.
Rain was about to fall and I didn’t want any hand of umbrella lending towards me to protect from it. I rather love to walk in the rain than walking alone in an umbrella.

As some writer said I also have the believe that the author should hold the pain of carrying a subject before producing as a mother holds the pain before giving birth to her child. And if she didn’t carry that pain the creation will not have that value and as for the same reason I didn’t gave an attempt to write before I have enough pain to deliver one.
Two months of vacation make me lazy that at 10 o clock I was already in bed. I had a lot to do for the next day but helpless, my brain and body is so weak. Heavy rain and cold is disturbing me too. There was a day when I used to sit near the half open window pain listening to the unknown symphony of rain and thunder. But these days I am not getting enough interest at these dramas of nature. At times my heart cries how i could change such away and realise the loss of innocence running behind the world in order to get some goals in life.
So as I said before I went to bed at 10 o clock and didn’t take long time to go to the deep sleep. Rain outside acts as a catalyst and I wrapped under my blanket holding my pillow tight. Goddess of dream were weaving a dream for me suddenly my cell rang high and the threads of dream broken in between and opened my eye with a regret. It was an unknown number so I pushed red button with an anger to disturb my dream. As I was about to go back to dream phone ranged again. I looked at the phone confusingly then answered with laziness at its peak. The voice from other end was familiar and my anger turned into a surprise.
Our conversation went long ,Heavy rain outside were not interested to enquire what is happening inside and now friend at other end left me by saying a good night but it was not a good night at all my dreams is now changed to thoughts all about

LOVE, LIFE AND DEADTH...
What a rare combination. Three different aspects but related to each other in a mystic way common people failed to understand.
Love is a wonderful feeling. Everyone will have a lot to describe about love. Even though the feeling of love experienced by person to person differs.
Love can lead to life and death when living for loved ones everyone will be proud to do so and everyone will be even happy to die with loved ones. And so what about dying for loved ones. But when the situation changes and dying for someone who even don’t know about the person’s love for him/her in which category I can tag that?

A LETTER TO DELHI.....

Dear friend,
I know I don’t need an introduction part to write to you. From the day you waved me before packing to Delhi near that old tree in our campus, my mind is still there near the fading picture of the guitar with a music that broken in-between
Far away sitting in the capital city beautifully decorated to invite the foreigners for common wealth game you will be also missing me in the same intensity as I do...
Even though this five months are going so fast the days away from you is making me count. Went to the closing ceremony of confluence where juniors were enjoying their arts and compete with the seniors to make their position the final years were in a sorrow stage to leave their friends and the lovely campus after few months, but my thoughts went in a different direction when our classmates were sharing their experience of training I really missed you and sat silently in one corner.
Those empty steps in the gallery and lonely street of campus are calling us. When our batch mates are eagerly packing their bag in a rush to fill it with memories my mind was full of question about how I am going to live that one year without that stupid’s always ready to tease me.
When started to write my mind was overflowing with matters to discuss with you and sitting in front waves of memories fades in the darkness of outside. Now who has the time to spend for writing a letter which will reach so late? Mixed in a bundle mingled with other letters having mixed feelings some of happiness and some of sorrows eagerly waiting to reach their destiny with no interest to know what is inside others my letter for you travel the long way from Kerala to Delhi just to see the smile in your face seeing my letter.
A letter to my best friend just to inform you that I am missing you.......

Your loving friend
Asha Sreenivas